To blog:
Sorry, I just needed someone , couldn’t find any so I decided to frust on you.

Recently I’ve been engaged in a love triangle…
I was unfortunately the third party..
i thought i can walk away just with my will to.. but i failed to do so.

We started as friends, well he is a potential, i tried resisting because he has a boyfriend, but its so hard to control within.. he'd touched me deep in my heart that i let myself to him..

I thought maybe i can walk away anytime, not until tonight

"L" came to my place feeling low, he broke up with "M"
I should be happy after hearing this but i'm not..
feeling rather confused.. its not because i don't love him,
but i felt sad for "M"
if i didn't enter their story, if it wasn't me, the story wouldn't end this way to them both...

I tried comforting him, he had his dinner here, and we settled down for a while,
not until "M" called..
i was in silent listening to their conversation,
"M" is still lovin him so much i can feel..
"M" wants to see him, "L" keeps rejecting..

I persuaded "L" to hear "M" out, and he did..
i send him away to meet "M"..
"L" told me not to worry,
and he'll be back...

till 1.30 midnight, i've been thinking and thinking, checking on my phone again and again, worrying that he might be under the void deck, since his mobile is dieing on him, i went downstairs to wait..

Waiting is really painful.. staring blank at my phone.. lookin around.. i'm getting more and more worried as the clock ticks.. then i realise i really really need him..

An hour passed and finally i got his message..
He went back with "M"
My tears were no longer in control..
emotions were filling me fast..
i lost to myself..
was i really stupid to give him away?
i brought it upon myself...
i gave him my blessings..

i cooled myself down and returned home..
its 4 in the morning now..
i couldn't get into sleep..
am cracking my head already..
ugh.. this is really torturing..
i cannot scream and i have to stay silent for i am not known..
what should i do...